Good evening reader.
The NFL Network has these two analysts. One of them, Brad Nessler, is monotone and calm while the other, Mike Mayock, has either done a bunch of coke, or needs to punch someone hard, with a lot of sustained intensity and aggression. I'm actually worried as of this writing that he could find me somehow. Makes my teeth turn when I have to endure their broadcast along with an otherwise quality NFL game.
Also, while driving to the kin-folks house today with my sidekick, the music sucked particularly hard, in case you were wondering. It, the radio, was mostly of the background-noise nature due to the ongoing conversation between Jack and I. Unfortunately, he fell asleep and I just drove with that shit on from there. My rigged-up ipod is still on the fritz, also unfortunate. It just stays in a funk, on the fritz, sometimes for a few days. One day...a week? It's tough to tell when the device will decide to wake up...Anyway. 99.3 was on by default, as I had been conducting research on it the other day, and then Kid Rock came on. Not one, but two full songs. Kid Rock makes my teeth turn.
Black Friday. The concept. The term. And the really overbearing and annoying branding being done with it, MAKES MY TEETH TURN. It is really up our asses, so bad. Seems more intense this season? I could be wrong, or maybe I simply haven't paid as much attention in the recent past. I'm not even joking. It turns my teeth when I hear it. I've tried to actually find the reasons inside my heart for why it is bothering me so much. Can't I just "play ball" with the artillery bombardment-like conditioning effort that the media will unleash upon us all?? Not like it's anything new...No. I can't. It sucks. Spending quality time with friends and family should be our focus. But that gets interrupted by signals on the TV to, Buy...on fucking Black Friday. Shit, one store has a fucking jingle with a girl singing "blaack Friday...Black Fridaaaaay..." Hey Kohls. (that's right, I know which store it is. See, I hated it so much the other day that I made sure to find out which store was responsible...) Fuck you Kohls. I know it's my own fault that I had the radio on and was also watching a good dose of TV Football, then TV in general. Just hate that shit man...I just hate it.
Chris Deprey turns my teeth. Because he's the one that, at least in my life, first uttered the phrase "Turns my teeth".
Ammo's barking is currently turning my teeth.
Otherwise, I'm having a solid Thanksgiving holiday so far. Hope you are too.
~ZFJ
Showing posts with label Chris Deprey. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Chris Deprey. Show all posts
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
UPDATED Top Ten CBR-STR Rankings
Hello readers. Through the duration of the last month, the CBR-STR efforts of the "elite" athletes were relatively laughable and almost a disgrace. Still, some contenders proved resiliant and creative while others were just plain consistent and diligent. Some have even made it to the CBR-STR for the first time. Either way, it all adds up to them having good times while making "fun" out of "me", my life, my soul and my dreams.
"Chop Bust Rating" or “CBR” is a designated number between 1-100 and will be reflective of recent and/or long standing ball busting, combined with the intensity of the shit talk & skit-making-up and divided by other numbers...then multiplied by still more numbers.
The "STR" -also known as the "Shit Talk Ratio" is an hourly over daily fraction such as “24/7” which represents the bulk amount of ball busting/shit-talking/chop busting that is done weekly. The Top Ten CBR-SBR Rakings will be updated periodically. Below are the current top ten rankings.
1) Christopher "Maurice" Deprey (aka San Fransisco Cocksucker, Iron Chris Deprey) Top Attributes: Good looking, creative, musician, lunatic.
Made The Top Ten because: Although Chris slipped drastically in his consistency in his shit talking and had minimal chop bust intensity last month, he did contribute excellent, thoughtful movie plots scenarios featuring good ole ZFJ as the main characters on my FB wall. However he stopped leaving actually-mean, not-joking messages as FB comments on my profile such as “you piece of shit” and/or “fuck you” which cost him points. He also took the initiative and posted Anita Baker videos on my page, which gained him points. And, he’s planning something new I'm sure.
STR: 24/7
CBR: 93
2) Rich Tardy (aka Rich, Tardy)
Top attributes: Intelligent, band-mate, sells the sizzle, best amigo.
Made the Top Ten because: He is still consistently the most productive person in either coming up with shit to bust on about my life both in my face and/or behind my back. Rich was highly successful in his first political campaign as he took down the most votes via readers poll for the best movie skit posting on my FB wall. Yay! Rich is a key enabler of Rob Driscoll, who has been sitting at the bar late nights drawing pictures of, “supposedly” ZFJ. He also led a recent shit talking session at the bar with Eric Arena, Mick Hubis, my neighbor Scott and of course Rob and Jenni, “The Artists”.
STR: 24/7
CBR: 92
3) Recruit (Aka: Ammo, Seppulon)
Top Attributes: Very cute, brilliant, methodical, calculating
Made The Top Ten because: Wow. Just had to yell at her again because, as I’m typing this, she is tickling my fucking elbow trying to burrow into one of the pillows of my "command station" here on the couch! Damn…Refer to blog post “A few thoughts about Ammo” for background on the battles with my dog. After her defiance reached unprecedented levels of audacity, I was forced to research and find that, my dog is actually trying to out-think me! The pissing on the floor…the couch sitting…flipping her food out of her dog bowl to eat it off the floor...or to enrage me?
STR:(N/A because she can’t talk. Would be: 24/7)
CBR: 90
4) Hollywood G-Man (aka Mike Govoni)
Top Attributes: Can legally shoot me, musician, lives on his own planet, Norm.
Made the Top Ten because: Although G-Man had a generally weak month, after writing the post “Imagine, Nothing to die for. Nothing to kill for. Part I”, it reminded me of how that man destroyed my dear, sweet sport and stripped me of my innocent and honorable thoughts about life. He also contributed solid movies skits and shit talking right on my FB wall. He still does not approve of my lifestyle or existence. Hates my former band. Hates my current band. Hates my future band.
STR: 15/6
CBR: 84
5) Rob Driscoll (aka Bobby D)
Top Attributes: Painfully good looking, hip, musician, artistic.
Made the Top Ten because: He remains a strong administrative/behind the scenes player in Rich's anti-ZFJ efforts. He is enthralled with trying to make me look like shit by drawing ZFJ pictures while drinking his life away at the bar and he continues to enjoy running skits with Rich and other people right in my face. Hates my current band.
STR: 11/7
CBR: 69 :)
6) Anonymous (aka “A Face In The Crowd”)
Top Attributes: Reads ZFJ Blog, hates my current band, has decent vocabulary, plays drums?
Made The Top Ten because: Runs at the mouth via text on this very blog, that is a GOOD thing. Hides behind the “Anonymous” tag which is lame. The mystery commenteer tries to talk all assertive and shit but ends up stammering around with untruths. Read the post, “The 'Left' Side of The Scene and How to Be A 'Northampton Band'", for exciting details.
STR: *Ranking system currently unable to process this data*
Estimate: Life is consumed with hatred of my band and Eric Suher.
CBR:38
7) Jenni Sussman(aka Jennifer Sussman)
Top Attributes: Artistic, “Sneaky Mean”, Gets to hang out with Rob Driscoll a lot, Good friend.
Made The Top Ten Because: She is a key enabler in the ZFJ drawings that Rob spends his days creating and even is gracious enough to lend her art skills to bring the drawings to "life". She also doesn’t like when we listen to mixes loud and she dates Rob, for now…
STR: 8/4
CBR: 37
8) Joseph Mancuso (aka Joey Kiss)
Top Attributes: Hot, cultured, actor, attractive.
Made the Top Ten because: He still joins in AND is a major contributor to ball busting despite being overwhelmed at times with his amazing fucking life. Hates my former band. Even with a pathetic chop bust/shit talk effort last month he did contribute rock solid, consistent movie skits to my FB wall. STR is low because last month, well, I guess his life was just too good to focus on chop busting. Good for him.
STR: 0.653/0.0236 * life still too good to focus enough for higher rating*
CBR: 41
9) Kevin Ace (aka Kevin Ace Demaria)
Top Attributes: Grammar, Wrestling Analysis, Saviour, Wiffle Ball
Made The Top Ten because: Well, let’s say he crawled in to The Top Ten CBR-STR Rankings. Due in part to the paltry efforts of other competitor's chop bust initiatives last month but mostly because of his effective movie skit placements and frequent referencing of a slight lisp I may have at times. The fact that he once raised me from the depths of hell only served to slightly magnify his sub-standard chop bust/shit talk efforts.
STR: 8/3
CBR: 25
10) Matt Silberstein (aka MAtt)
Top Attributes: Facial hair, musician, music knowledge, room-mate.
Made the Top Ten because: Persists in singing Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up" en route to the shower. Told me to basically pound sand when I asked to use his bass head for a show and then proceeded to use my bass cab for practice. I wrote this just to get him pissed, which I think worked… Otherwise, his CBR/STR is just in the toilet right now. URGENT REAL TIME UPDATE!!! He just busted in the front door with aggression when I asked him if he has a certain drum stool in his posession! Wow readers, FYI his ranking was literally just "14". He gained 6 points just like that again proving that, the race ain't over until it's over!
STR: 6/2
CBR: 20
Stay tuned for updates as the world class athletes featured right here on ZFJ Blog continue to battle for prestige and power in the CBR-STR Rankings!
~ZFJ
"Chop Bust Rating" or “CBR” is a designated number between 1-100 and will be reflective of recent and/or long standing ball busting, combined with the intensity of the shit talk & skit-making-up and divided by other numbers...then multiplied by still more numbers.
The "STR" -also known as the "Shit Talk Ratio" is an hourly over daily fraction such as “24/7” which represents the bulk amount of ball busting/shit-talking/chop busting that is done weekly. The Top Ten CBR-SBR Rakings will be updated periodically. Below are the current top ten rankings.
1) Christopher "Maurice" Deprey (aka San Fransisco Cocksucker, Iron Chris Deprey) Top Attributes: Good looking, creative, musician, lunatic.
Made The Top Ten because: Although Chris slipped drastically in his consistency in his shit talking and had minimal chop bust intensity last month, he did contribute excellent, thoughtful movie plots scenarios featuring good ole ZFJ as the main characters on my FB wall. However he stopped leaving actually-mean, not-joking messages as FB comments on my profile such as “you piece of shit” and/or “fuck you” which cost him points. He also took the initiative and posted Anita Baker videos on my page, which gained him points. And, he’s planning something new I'm sure.
STR: 24/7
CBR: 93
2) Rich Tardy (aka Rich, Tardy)
Top attributes: Intelligent, band-mate, sells the sizzle, best amigo.
Made the Top Ten because: He is still consistently the most productive person in either coming up with shit to bust on about my life both in my face and/or behind my back. Rich was highly successful in his first political campaign as he took down the most votes via readers poll for the best movie skit posting on my FB wall. Yay! Rich is a key enabler of Rob Driscoll, who has been sitting at the bar late nights drawing pictures of, “supposedly” ZFJ. He also led a recent shit talking session at the bar with Eric Arena, Mick Hubis, my neighbor Scott and of course Rob and Jenni, “The Artists”.
STR: 24/7
CBR: 92
3) Recruit (Aka: Ammo, Seppulon)
Top Attributes: Very cute, brilliant, methodical, calculating
Made The Top Ten because: Wow. Just had to yell at her again because, as I’m typing this, she is tickling my fucking elbow trying to burrow into one of the pillows of my "command station" here on the couch! Damn…Refer to blog post “A few thoughts about Ammo” for background on the battles with my dog. After her defiance reached unprecedented levels of audacity, I was forced to research and find that, my dog is actually trying to out-think me! The pissing on the floor…the couch sitting…flipping her food out of her dog bowl to eat it off the floor...or to enrage me?
STR:(N/A because she can’t talk. Would be: 24/7)
CBR: 90
4) Hollywood G-Man (aka Mike Govoni)
Top Attributes: Can legally shoot me, musician, lives on his own planet, Norm.
Made the Top Ten because: Although G-Man had a generally weak month, after writing the post “Imagine, Nothing to die for. Nothing to kill for. Part I”, it reminded me of how that man destroyed my dear, sweet sport and stripped me of my innocent and honorable thoughts about life. He also contributed solid movies skits and shit talking right on my FB wall. He still does not approve of my lifestyle or existence. Hates my former band. Hates my current band. Hates my future band.
STR: 15/6
CBR: 84
5) Rob Driscoll (aka Bobby D)
Top Attributes: Painfully good looking, hip, musician, artistic.
Made the Top Ten because: He remains a strong administrative/behind the scenes player in Rich's anti-ZFJ efforts. He is enthralled with trying to make me look like shit by drawing ZFJ pictures while drinking his life away at the bar and he continues to enjoy running skits with Rich and other people right in my face. Hates my current band.
STR: 11/7
CBR: 69 :)
6) Anonymous (aka “A Face In The Crowd”)
Top Attributes: Reads ZFJ Blog, hates my current band, has decent vocabulary, plays drums?
Made The Top Ten because: Runs at the mouth via text on this very blog, that is a GOOD thing. Hides behind the “Anonymous” tag which is lame. The mystery commenteer tries to talk all assertive and shit but ends up stammering around with untruths. Read the post, “The 'Left' Side of The Scene and How to Be A 'Northampton Band'", for exciting details.
STR: *Ranking system currently unable to process this data*
Estimate: Life is consumed with hatred of my band and Eric Suher.
CBR:38
7) Jenni Sussman(aka Jennifer Sussman)
Top Attributes: Artistic, “Sneaky Mean”, Gets to hang out with Rob Driscoll a lot, Good friend.
Made The Top Ten Because: She is a key enabler in the ZFJ drawings that Rob spends his days creating and even is gracious enough to lend her art skills to bring the drawings to "life". She also doesn’t like when we listen to mixes loud and she dates Rob, for now…
STR: 8/4
CBR: 37
8) Joseph Mancuso (aka Joey Kiss)
Top Attributes: Hot, cultured, actor, attractive.
Made the Top Ten because: He still joins in AND is a major contributor to ball busting despite being overwhelmed at times with his amazing fucking life. Hates my former band. Even with a pathetic chop bust/shit talk effort last month he did contribute rock solid, consistent movie skits to my FB wall. STR is low because last month, well, I guess his life was just too good to focus on chop busting. Good for him.
STR: 0.653/0.0236 * life still too good to focus enough for higher rating*
CBR: 41
9) Kevin Ace (aka Kevin Ace Demaria)
Top Attributes: Grammar, Wrestling Analysis, Saviour, Wiffle Ball
Made The Top Ten because: Well, let’s say he crawled in to The Top Ten CBR-STR Rankings. Due in part to the paltry efforts of other competitor's chop bust initiatives last month but mostly because of his effective movie skit placements and frequent referencing of a slight lisp I may have at times. The fact that he once raised me from the depths of hell only served to slightly magnify his sub-standard chop bust/shit talk efforts.
STR: 8/3
CBR: 25
10) Matt Silberstein (aka MAtt)
Top Attributes: Facial hair, musician, music knowledge, room-mate.
Made the Top Ten because: Persists in singing Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up" en route to the shower. Told me to basically pound sand when I asked to use his bass head for a show and then proceeded to use my bass cab for practice. I wrote this just to get him pissed, which I think worked… Otherwise, his CBR/STR is just in the toilet right now. URGENT REAL TIME UPDATE!!! He just busted in the front door with aggression when I asked him if he has a certain drum stool in his posession! Wow readers, FYI his ranking was literally just "14". He gained 6 points just like that again proving that, the race ain't over until it's over!
STR: 6/2
CBR: 20
Stay tuned for updates as the world class athletes featured right here on ZFJ Blog continue to battle for prestige and power in the CBR-STR Rankings!
~ZFJ
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
UPDATED: Top Ten CBR-SBR Rankings
As my friend and fellow Blogger, http://prewarcondition.blogspot.com would say, "All calls will be answered in the order they were received."
Hello readers. In this blog you will frequently read about things I get my balls busted for and the people responsible for it. Things I like are scrutinized and turned into fun for other people. They create fun for themselves, out of “me”...And, I'm just trying to live over here. I get my balls broken for: My love of Coleslaw, my “control station”, Ranch dressing, my "weight" problem, French dressing, fantasy football, my former band, my current band, Ammo and even the fact that I lost 11 sports bets in a row over the weekend. Hard to do...I do appreciate these people in weird ways. Not hard to do.
I've been devising this ratings report for the last few years but the overall "Chop Bust Rating" or “CBR” will be a designated number between 1-100 and will be reflective of the last year and a half or so of ball busting, combined with the intensity of the shit talk & skit-making-up and divided by other numbers...then multiplied by still more numbers.
The "STR" -also known as the "Shit Talk Ratio" is an hourly over daily fraction such as “24/7” which represents the bulk amount of ball busting/shit-talking/chop busting that is done weekly. The Top Ten CBR-SBR Rakings will be updated periodically. Below are the current top ten rankings.
1) Christopher "Maurice" Deprey (aka San Fransisco Cocksucker, Iron Chris Deprey) Top Attributes: Good looking, creative, musician, lunatic.
Made The Top Ten because: He recently created a skit where I had Gene Simmons (KISS) face makeup on but was in normal clothes during normal situations in every day life. In the skit, the people interacting with me did not ever seem to notice my makeup. He managed to work with Rich Tardy to spread this to at least 20 mutual friends and in excess of 100 different skits before I even knew about it. He also hates my former band. And, there's so much more.
STR: 24/7
CBR: 91
2) Rich Tardy (aka Rich, Tardy)
Top attributes: Intelligent, band-mate, sells the sizzle, best amigo.
Made the Top Ten because: He is consistently the most productive person in either coming up with shit to bust on about my life both in my face and/or behind my back. He also enjoys jumping in/supplementing other shit talking initiatives. And again, so much more.
STR: 24/7
CBR: 87
3) Mick Hubis (aka Demetrios Kanavaros)
Top attributes: Intelligent, grammar, musician, very outspoken.
Made the list because: He just belted me with some blogging about how lame I am. Often created(s) laughter and good times at my expense. Hates my current band. Is still awesome.
STR: 19/6
CBR: 83
4) Hollywood G-Man (aka Mike Govoni)
Top Attributes: Can legally shoot me, musician, is on his own planet, Norm.
Made the Top Ten because: He throws Biblical Proverbs at me and has inspired dullards like Dan D to also throw proverbs at me in efforts to demean me. He also does not approve of my lifestyle or existence. Hates my former band. Hates my current band. Hates my future band.
STR: 20/7
CBR: 75
5) Binaural Chinchilla-Scranton (aka Chet Thunder, Brian O'Toole)
Top attributes: Imaginative, witty, musician, writer.
Made the Top Ten because: Although we don't know each too well, he has posted two blazingly funny and demeaning versions of 1) the mint hotel album and 2) the other night's show @ Maximum Capacity. Also conducts excellent and well spoken smack talk sessions from time to time. Hates my former band. Hates my current band. Hates my future band?
STR: 13/2
CBR: 75
6) Bill Nacewicz (aka Billdo, Douchebag)
Top Attributes: Great Drummer, Whiskey, Beer, Madden (EA Sports)
Made the Top Ten because: He drop kicked me (double leg) in the back after a recording session a few years ago, shot beer into my belly button at a rehearsal and made me endure his drum overplaying for years. Hates my former band. Reads Elf Books. Hated being in a band with someone who was once in my former band :) Will probably be in my future band.
STR: 12/4
CBR: 70
7) Rob Driscoll (aka Bobby D)
Top Attributes: Painfully good looking, hip, musician, artistic.
Made the Top Ten because: He is a strong administrative/behind the scenes player in Rich's anti-ZFJ efforts. He recently worked with accomplice/girlfriend Jenni Sussman to draw the ZFJ cartoon that supposedly looks like me. This was not meant as a compliment. Rob also enjoys running skits with Rich and other people right in my face. Hates my current band.
STR: 12/5
CBR: 69 :)
8) Matt Silberstein (aka MAtt)
Top Attributes: Facial hair, musician, music knowledge, room-mate.
Made the Top Ten because: He decided one day that it is somehow humorous to sing Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up" en route to the shower. Wearing only a towel -thank the Gods for the towel. My eyes and my poor little son's eyes have both seen this horror repeatedly. He is regular contributor in chop busting. Also, Just asked him to pack this bowl and he goes “Oh yes sir! Right away sir.” In Jest about me writing this and having him run along to tend to that grunt work. Hates my former band.
STR: 15/4
CBR: 67
9) Colleen Knight (aka the Knight Owl)
Top attributes: Smart, witty, well spoken, works too much.
Made the Top Ten because: I realized that there were no girls on the list. Then I also realized how intensly she busted my chops with Rich about ranch/french dressing, eating too much, Ammo, and my life in general. She, being one of Rich's best friend, has had plenty of laughs at my expense.
STR: 10/1 *too busy/life is too good to focus enough for higher rating*
CBR: 55
10) Joseph Mancuso (aka Joey Kiss)
Top Attributes: Hot, cultured, actor, attractive.
Made the Top Ten because: He joins in AND is a major contributor to ball busting. Hates my former band. Has a much better life than I do.
STR: 10/1 *his life is far too good to focus enough for higher rating*
CBR: 50
Check back for real time updates as these elite athletes and other up-and-comers battle for Top Ten CBR-SBR Ranking honors!
A narcissistic post this was - not even busting your balls there Hubis.
~ZFJ
Hello readers. In this blog you will frequently read about things I get my balls busted for and the people responsible for it. Things I like are scrutinized and turned into fun for other people. They create fun for themselves, out of “me”...And, I'm just trying to live over here. I get my balls broken for: My love of Coleslaw, my “control station”, Ranch dressing, my "weight" problem, French dressing, fantasy football, my former band, my current band, Ammo and even the fact that I lost 11 sports bets in a row over the weekend. Hard to do...I do appreciate these people in weird ways. Not hard to do.
I've been devising this ratings report for the last few years but the overall "Chop Bust Rating" or “CBR” will be a designated number between 1-100 and will be reflective of the last year and a half or so of ball busting, combined with the intensity of the shit talk & skit-making-up and divided by other numbers...then multiplied by still more numbers.
The "STR" -also known as the "Shit Talk Ratio" is an hourly over daily fraction such as “24/7” which represents the bulk amount of ball busting/shit-talking/chop busting that is done weekly. The Top Ten CBR-SBR Rakings will be updated periodically. Below are the current top ten rankings.
1) Christopher "Maurice" Deprey (aka San Fransisco Cocksucker, Iron Chris Deprey) Top Attributes: Good looking, creative, musician, lunatic.
Made The Top Ten because: He recently created a skit where I had Gene Simmons (KISS) face makeup on but was in normal clothes during normal situations in every day life. In the skit, the people interacting with me did not ever seem to notice my makeup. He managed to work with Rich Tardy to spread this to at least 20 mutual friends and in excess of 100 different skits before I even knew about it. He also hates my former band. And, there's so much more.
STR: 24/7
CBR: 91
2) Rich Tardy (aka Rich, Tardy)
Top attributes: Intelligent, band-mate, sells the sizzle, best amigo.
Made the Top Ten because: He is consistently the most productive person in either coming up with shit to bust on about my life both in my face and/or behind my back. He also enjoys jumping in/supplementing other shit talking initiatives. And again, so much more.
STR: 24/7
CBR: 87
3) Mick Hubis (aka Demetrios Kanavaros)
Top attributes: Intelligent, grammar, musician, very outspoken.
Made the list because: He just belted me with some blogging about how lame I am. Often created(s) laughter and good times at my expense. Hates my current band. Is still awesome.
STR: 19/6
CBR: 83
4) Hollywood G-Man (aka Mike Govoni)
Top Attributes: Can legally shoot me, musician, is on his own planet, Norm.
Made the Top Ten because: He throws Biblical Proverbs at me and has inspired dullards like Dan D to also throw proverbs at me in efforts to demean me. He also does not approve of my lifestyle or existence. Hates my former band. Hates my current band. Hates my future band.
STR: 20/7
CBR: 75
5) Binaural Chinchilla-Scranton (aka Chet Thunder, Brian O'Toole)
Top attributes: Imaginative, witty, musician, writer.
Made the Top Ten because: Although we don't know each too well, he has posted two blazingly funny and demeaning versions of 1) the mint hotel album and 2) the other night's show @ Maximum Capacity. Also conducts excellent and well spoken smack talk sessions from time to time. Hates my former band. Hates my current band. Hates my future band?
STR: 13/2
CBR: 75
6) Bill Nacewicz (aka Billdo, Douchebag)
Top Attributes: Great Drummer, Whiskey, Beer, Madden (EA Sports)
Made the Top Ten because: He drop kicked me (double leg) in the back after a recording session a few years ago, shot beer into my belly button at a rehearsal and made me endure his drum overplaying for years. Hates my former band. Reads Elf Books. Hated being in a band with someone who was once in my former band :) Will probably be in my future band.
STR: 12/4
CBR: 70
7) Rob Driscoll (aka Bobby D)
Top Attributes: Painfully good looking, hip, musician, artistic.
Made the Top Ten because: He is a strong administrative/behind the scenes player in Rich's anti-ZFJ efforts. He recently worked with accomplice/girlfriend Jenni Sussman to draw the ZFJ cartoon that supposedly looks like me. This was not meant as a compliment. Rob also enjoys running skits with Rich and other people right in my face. Hates my current band.
STR: 12/5
CBR: 69 :)
8) Matt Silberstein (aka MAtt)
Top Attributes: Facial hair, musician, music knowledge, room-mate.
Made the Top Ten because: He decided one day that it is somehow humorous to sing Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up" en route to the shower. Wearing only a towel -thank the Gods for the towel. My eyes and my poor little son's eyes have both seen this horror repeatedly. He is regular contributor in chop busting. Also, Just asked him to pack this bowl and he goes “Oh yes sir! Right away sir.” In Jest about me writing this and having him run along to tend to that grunt work. Hates my former band.
STR: 15/4
CBR: 67
9) Colleen Knight (aka the Knight Owl)
Top attributes: Smart, witty, well spoken, works too much.
Made the Top Ten because: I realized that there were no girls on the list. Then I also realized how intensly she busted my chops with Rich about ranch/french dressing, eating too much, Ammo, and my life in general. She, being one of Rich's best friend, has had plenty of laughs at my expense.
STR: 10/1 *too busy/life is too good to focus enough for higher rating*
CBR: 55
10) Joseph Mancuso (aka Joey Kiss)
Top Attributes: Hot, cultured, actor, attractive.
Made the Top Ten because: He joins in AND is a major contributor to ball busting. Hates my former band. Has a much better life than I do.
STR: 10/1 *his life is far too good to focus enough for higher rating*
CBR: 50
Check back for real time updates as these elite athletes and other up-and-comers battle for Top Ten CBR-SBR Ranking honors!
A narcissistic post this was - not even busting your balls there Hubis.
~ZFJ
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