Frequent Flyer

Hi.

We've been all around town flyering for our show on the 31st!! Yay!! Everyone in this town likes and utilizes flyers to advertise their respective crafts...they're everywhere. A good, well-designed, catchy flyer is definitely a must-have and you're not "cool" if you don't have a good flyer. Got to have a good flyer....I mean, they're on bulletin boards, at the entrances of restaurants and clubs...they're online (of course), why, they're even sometimes under the windshield wiper of your car!

Anyway, I've been trying to get approval to hang one up on one of the community bulletin boards in the health club I frequent (ok, okay. maybe I don't frequent it...). It'll be really cool to hang one up there, if I get the approval that is. See, from my recent experiences, I've come to the conclusion that hanging a flyer at the health club is a huge deal. Last week, during a scintillating run on the treadmill, I hatched an evil plan. See, if I were to hang a flyer on the bulletin board in the hallway en route to the workout rooms, then everyone who walked by it would be forced, by default of having to walk by that area, to see it.

Aaaaahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa!! Yet another plan was born....So, after the run, I asked the nice girl at the front desk if I could hang a flyer on one of the three available bulletin boards. She replied with "Duuh, I don't know the policy for that...I'd have to ask the manager..." The policy???

Wow. Okay...I said "Don't worry about it, I'll check back at a later date.", still keeping my diabolical plan fresh in my mind as I departed. A few days later after finishing another workout, the whole time continuing to nurture my evil plan of "force-feeding" my flyer unto the eyes of all the health club patrons. Upon completion of the workout, I approach the kid at the front desk with the half sleeve tattoo (very personable guy by the way) and ask if I can hang the flyer. He replies (very nicely and "gate-keeper-esq") with, "Hmmmm...good question. I'm not sure what the policy is for that. I can check with Brenda to see if she would approve that...". I say "Ok. Sounds good. Maybe I can talk with Brenda myself? What does she look like? When is she here normally?" He replies, "She usually is here in the mornings...she wears a hat backwards usually." etc etc. I go, "OK man, thanks. I'll see if I can catch up with her". So yesterday I visited the health club again, finished a workout and asked the girl at the desk if Brenda was there. She informed me that Brenda had just left.

Fuck. At this point I began to fear that my plan would not come to fruition as I had once hoped.

The girl at the desk (different from the first girl by the way) asked what I wanted to talk with Brenda about and I explained that I wanted to hang a flyer up on one of the bulletin boards. She replied with "Oh. Ok. Well....can you bring in the flyer and I can get it to Brenda? I need to see if she will approve it and then, hopefully, you can put it up on that bulletin board over there" (she points to a lonely, non-featured bulletin board right near the door rather than the prime real estate right in the hallway to the workout room). My heart sank a bit as I realized that, even if I get approval to hang up the flyer, it will not be in the most visible spot within the health club and therefore will spare some of the members from seeing it. Fuck. Shit.

Anyway, I brought in the flyer, handed it to the girl and asked if I should follow up to check the status of the approval process. She politely (possibly even bubble-ey) informed me that, when I come to the club next time, it will either be hung up....or not.

Shit.


Well, either way readers, I'm really hoping that I get approval to hang that fucking flyer up there. Considering the process, and the "ringer", they've put me through, I would feel especially accomplished if I see that pretty lil' flyer on that bulletin board.


~ZFJ