Hi.
Driving in my Range Rover (Mitshubishi Galant) down Broadway in Manhattan (Main St, Northampton)the other day...anyway. My car's CD player shit the bed some time ago but that's no problem because I rigged up one of my ipods to the stereo. As a result of my ingenuity, I get to listen to music I want, rather than the shitty/available radio stations. But, inevitably the ipod --which has dependency on radio signals being clear in order for it's reception to be clear-- goes on the fritz now and then. The other day it went on one of these fritzes and I had to resort to: Mainstream radio. I had Rock 102 on for a bit because the music, classic rock, is very tolerable. However, I had to switch the station because I couldn't handle the mindless, self-absorbed drivel that Bax & O'Brien were spewing over the airwaves.
Then I switched to 99.3 FM. I'll admit, I occasionally listen to this station even when the ipod is working, in order to "research" what the radio is playing for all of us average listeners these days. Bad move, as always.
I got hit with various Nu-Metal songs and paltry attempts at humor from the stale DJ's. I once again was not surprised with what I got served, but still, it got me to thinking about a topic that I had been kind of burning on for awhile. With so much great, open, passionate and fresh music available in the world, why does mainstream "rock" radio continue to force watered-down, thoughtless and formulaic songs from every conceivable Nu-Metal band on people?? And why does most NU-Metal music sound basically the same? Why not feature other styles of rock music? Why does modern "radio-friendly" rock music all seem to be NU-Metal?? At least this is what 99.3 FM is slinging. But why??? Why won't NU-Metal bands expand their overall dynamic? I mean, the very term for the genre came about because of the mixture of rock with hip-hop/DJ elements. Why can't they continue to find new mixtures that may be fresh?
Please remember, this blog contains factual opinions.
Why? Because, they want to sell the product that they know will sell. Art seems to be a secondary thought --if considered at all. It's about sales folks...and when you've got a proven system for sales, you stick to it. So, write music that will work on the radio, will appeal to the "everyday" folks out there and that will sell albums, songs and tickets to the show. **I'm all for people making livings from their music. I just feel that people sometimes, in order to make this living, will "run a business" rather than creating their art. They just put out a solid "product" that, based on status-quo, they believe will sell.** Why, it seems that over the years, NU-Metal music has found actual "formulas" that work (sell) and, if it ain't broke, don't fix it. The "Godfathers of NU-Metal", Korn, once admitted to writing in formulas. The band Staind did as well. Don't quote me...but listen.
Here are brief descriptions of the three basic formulas:
#1) The "positive-affirmation-you'll-never-hold-me-down-and-I'll-emerge-stronger-from-this-torment" type song. This song will usually feature some kind of rawkin' intro riff (which may also occur after each chorus to lead the verse back in). The verses will scale back dynamically, usually relying on the bass to shine through with some picking on the guitar. The singer will try to sound like Layne Staley (RIP) while delivering the strife parts of his or her "situation" to the listener. The chorus will contain tag lines with mass appeal qualities, so we can all relate to their plight. The bridge will occur upon completion of chorus #2 and there will be a third chorus or verse riff to take the song out.
#2) The "I'm-such-a-bad-boy-who,-if-you-decide-to-mingle-with,-will-turn-you-"bad"-just-like-me-and-you'll-like-it." This song formula also features a rawkin' intro riff which again, may recur in the song. However, while the verses usually change dynamically in similar style to the aforementioned formula, they will usually feature a muted guitar riff while the "bad boy" singer tells us why he's so dangerous and out of control. The verses will feature porn star references, stripper pole references, dirty sex references and other "taboo" lyrics to establish just how fucking bad-ass the singer is in his life. The chorus will usually be "explosive" with stupid tag lines such as "I'm an American Nightmare..." that inspire us to try and be bad-ass like the singer is. The bridge will usually occur upon completion of the second chorus and will either be extremely rawkin' or will bring the dynamic MUCH lower, in order to set up further explosiveness for the third chorus or nasty riff to take the song out.
#3) The "ultra-introspective/comin'-clean" type of song. This is the big change of pace for most rawkin' NU-Metal bands. This type of formula normally features acoustic guitar music --many times almost sounding like Country Music-- (I surmise that there are real parallels between Country Music and NU-Metal music as they both rely on putting out a sell-able "product" for the masses to consume?). This type of formula is gaining popularity as more NU-Metal bands have realized that they must expand their song dynamics in order to keep selling records, catering to the opinions of the masses and of course, getting radio play. This type of song is designed to let you know that the band you view as taboo, dangerous, uncontrollably-sexual and wild also has a sensitive side. They want to let you know that they're not just big "rawk stars" like you think, they're also just like you. They want you to relate to them. They want you to buy their record.
yawn...
I know...I know. Who the fuck am I to spew these opinions all over the blogosphere??? Well, a few years ago I was a member of a band that, while it didn't start out as NU-Metal, it surely "evolved" into it. While I'd like to mention that we had some level of substance and integrity, we still consciously wrote music to appeal, to be "Radio friendly" and to be marketable. I left that band to pursue the art I felt was inside me. I wanted to shed the parameters that I felt were established in NU-Metal music by radio, by industry professionals we consulted with, by our fans and by ourselves. I wanted to find the honest messages within me and bring them out, regardless of who may "buy" it. (Tearing at your heartstrings?)
While still spinning my heels with this band, I remember particular phone conversation I had with a good friend. I complained about Rock music and how sterile and repetitive it felt to me. How every song on the radio bored me and seemed repetitive and contrived. I'm forever indebted to this friend who slapped the reality on me: He vehemently informed me that Rock music was not sterile. The music being fed to me is sterile. He said if I want to find the music that moves me then I have to take initiative and search for it.
Which I did.
I hope you do.
Or just like whatever you want and enjoy the upcoming holiday, eat drink and be merry!!!
and turn off mainstream rock radio once in awhile. :)
~ZFJ
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
The Normalcy Bias
In continuing with my holiday kickoff theme, I've decided to just include some eye-opening information about what exactly is a Normalcy Bias. But before we begin, I must tell you that I'm dropping this on you because you need to be awake. Really. I watched a video yesterday that was quite sobering (about the potential for the U.S. Dollar to be further devalued and possibly not continue as the worlds exchange currency...uh oh)...
Anyway, that's what stimulated my thoughts about Normalcy Bias. Many/most of us think, because something hasn't happened yet, that it never will. There are just too many examples in world history to not open your mind to what could happen. We have to take a really good look at what is happening --then look deeper into "why" things are happening--and begin to think on your feet to handle the lightning speed changes that our world is bringing to us. Serious shit here reader. But, as you know, ZFJ Blog is here to help.
The only consistency in life is change.
And now, what exactly is Normalcy Bias?
From Wikipedia:
"Normalcy bias
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
The normalcy bias, or normality bias, refers to a mental state people enter when facing a disaster. It causes people to underestimate both the possibility of a disaster occurring and its possible effects. This often results in situations where people fail to adequately prepare for a disaster, and on a larger scale, the failure governments to include the populace in its disaster preparations. The assumption that is made in the case of the normalcy bias is that since a disaster never has occurred then it never will occur. It also results in the inability of people to cope with a disaster once it occurs. People with a normalcy bias have difficulties reacting to something they have not experienced before. People also tend to interpret warnings in the most optimistic way possible, seizing on any ambiguities to infer a less serious situation.[1]
The normalcy bias may be caused in part by the way the brain processes new data. Research suggests that even when the brain is calm, it takes 8–10 seconds to process new information. Stress slows the process, and when the brain cannot find an acceptable response to a situation, it fixates on a single solution that may or may not be correct. An evolutionary reason for this response could be that paralysis gives an animal a better chance of surviving an attack; predators are less likely to eat prey that isn't struggling.[2]
Effects
The normalcy bias often results in unnecessary deaths in disaster situations. The lack of preparation for disasters often leads to inadequate shelter, supplies, and evacuation plans. Even when all these things are in place, individuals with a normalcy bias often refuse to leave their homes. Studies have shown that more than 70% of people check with others before deciding to evacuate.[2]
The normalcy bias or the sheep effect also causes people to drastically underestimate the effects of the disaster. Therefore, they think that everything will be all right, while information from the radio, television, or neighbors gives them reason to believe there is a risk. This creates a cognitive dissonance that they then must work to eliminate. Some manage to eliminate it by refusing to believe new warnings coming in and refusing to evacuate (maintaining the normalcy bias), while others eliminate the dissonance by escaping the danger. The possibility that some may refuse to evacuate causes significant problems in disaster planning.
Examples
Little Sioux Scout camp in June 2008. Despite being in the middle of "Tornado Alley," the campground had no tornado shelter to offer protection from a strong tornado.[4]
New Orleans before Hurricane Katrina. Inadequate government and citizen preparation and the denial that the levees could fail were an example of the normalcy bias, as was the thousands of people who refused to evacuate.
The September 11th Attacks can also be seen as a case of normalcy bias. Although the US Government received adequate signals that an attack was being organized, inadequate steps were taken to prevent it."
The video I saw yesterday is here
http://www.newamerica15.com
You'll need an hour to watch it if you're interested...
Happy Holidays!!
~ZFJ
Anyway, that's what stimulated my thoughts about Normalcy Bias. Many/most of us think, because something hasn't happened yet, that it never will. There are just too many examples in world history to not open your mind to what could happen. We have to take a really good look at what is happening --then look deeper into "why" things are happening--and begin to think on your feet to handle the lightning speed changes that our world is bringing to us. Serious shit here reader. But, as you know, ZFJ Blog is here to help.
The only consistency in life is change.
And now, what exactly is Normalcy Bias?
From Wikipedia:
"Normalcy bias
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
The normalcy bias, or normality bias, refers to a mental state people enter when facing a disaster. It causes people to underestimate both the possibility of a disaster occurring and its possible effects. This often results in situations where people fail to adequately prepare for a disaster, and on a larger scale, the failure governments to include the populace in its disaster preparations. The assumption that is made in the case of the normalcy bias is that since a disaster never has occurred then it never will occur. It also results in the inability of people to cope with a disaster once it occurs. People with a normalcy bias have difficulties reacting to something they have not experienced before. People also tend to interpret warnings in the most optimistic way possible, seizing on any ambiguities to infer a less serious situation.[1]
The normalcy bias may be caused in part by the way the brain processes new data. Research suggests that even when the brain is calm, it takes 8–10 seconds to process new information. Stress slows the process, and when the brain cannot find an acceptable response to a situation, it fixates on a single solution that may or may not be correct. An evolutionary reason for this response could be that paralysis gives an animal a better chance of surviving an attack; predators are less likely to eat prey that isn't struggling.[2]
Effects
The normalcy bias often results in unnecessary deaths in disaster situations. The lack of preparation for disasters often leads to inadequate shelter, supplies, and evacuation plans. Even when all these things are in place, individuals with a normalcy bias often refuse to leave their homes. Studies have shown that more than 70% of people check with others before deciding to evacuate.[2]
The normalcy bias or the sheep effect also causes people to drastically underestimate the effects of the disaster. Therefore, they think that everything will be all right, while information from the radio, television, or neighbors gives them reason to believe there is a risk. This creates a cognitive dissonance that they then must work to eliminate. Some manage to eliminate it by refusing to believe new warnings coming in and refusing to evacuate (maintaining the normalcy bias), while others eliminate the dissonance by escaping the danger. The possibility that some may refuse to evacuate causes significant problems in disaster planning.
Examples
Little Sioux Scout camp in June 2008. Despite being in the middle of "Tornado Alley," the campground had no tornado shelter to offer protection from a strong tornado.[4]
New Orleans before Hurricane Katrina. Inadequate government and citizen preparation and the denial that the levees could fail were an example of the normalcy bias, as was the thousands of people who refused to evacuate.
The September 11th Attacks can also be seen as a case of normalcy bias. Although the US Government received adequate signals that an attack was being organized, inadequate steps were taken to prevent it."
The video I saw yesterday is here
http://www.newamerica15.com
You'll need an hour to watch it if you're interested...
Happy Holidays!!
~ZFJ
Monday, November 21, 2011
Dark Corners & Lifestyle Messages
Happy Monday reader!
And happy holiday season...which, if you have turned on the television, entered a retail store, listened to the radio or have generally been not-sleeping to any extent, you have already been innundated with holiday messages, huge sales alerts and various other messages. All serving to drive home the point of how we "need" to get out and buy shit.
But first, I'd like to mention that I had a great weekend full of recording music, attending "Friendsgiving" and watching the Dolphins win their third straight game. I don't know what the future of "The Bastion of Despair" will be now that the Fins just can't stop winning... I'll just have to cross that bridge when it is time. On Saturday evening, right after the studio session, we drove to Cambridge for "Friendsgiving", and despite our fatigue, it was a fun holiday time as per usual. Friendsgiving really kicks off the holiday season, in my opinion. Prior to the evenings festivities in Cambridge, our Saturday recording session was rewarding and liberating, as recording sessions usually are for us. Not many things can replace the feeling of "making it official", with regards to the music we've been working on for the last year or so. Here's a shout out to Zeuss, Metal music Producer/engineer extraordinaire --and also our drum track engineer for this album. We don't play Metal music but we sure do like the raw drum tones he can get!! The guy is meticulous. The guy is awesome.
While at the studio with drum tracking in-progress, we engaged in our tradition of perusing the selection of Metal magazines in order to find Metal band names and album titles that are funny to us. We not only found a few gems, but also realized how dead fucking serious these bands are about striking fear into the hearts of the listener. And how serious they are about tapping into the "black" parts of the soul and the mind in their album titles. It occured to us that Metal bands, especially "Death" Metal, "Black" Metal, "Viking" Metal and the like, will forever be locked in an everlasting quest to create super-fast, highly agressive and very evil music. Equally important to the quest of fast, evil music is the quest to name their albums in the most fear-inspiring, "dark", occult-like and sickening-thought-conjuring nature. Which is funny. Here's a few samples:
Baptized in Blood, "Baptized in Blood"
Carnifex, "The Diseased and the Poisoned"
Hell Within, "Asylum of the Human Predator"
With Blood Comes Cleansing, "Horror"
Arsis, "We Are the Nightmare"
Dimmu Borgir, "Death Cult Armageddon"
Cradle Of Filth, "Damnation And A Day"
Wow. Take it easy? Life isn't that bad? Try to tell that to these bands though and they will gladly kill you with their evil bare hands or, and surely most preferably to them, with a human sacrifice --of YOU-- to Satan, or whatever other dark entity they're singing about. Watch it?
*sigh*
Well reader, Happy Holidays, again. Now is the time of year that hopefully we can unwind and spend quality time with loved ones, family and friends. It's the time of year for giving. And it's the time of year that retail operations in this country energetically and methodically drill this message into our brains and souls. We know, we know...we "have" to give presents. We have to spend money and they, the various retail operations, love receiving our money. This is not a secret, we all know that they're in business to make money. We just endure the blitzkrieg that begins around Halloween....Every season.......Every channel....Every commercial... Every radio.....Every website.....Every possible form of pressure to buy, both subtle and overt.
But that's not even my point. What I'm getting at is how all this effort only enhances my personal distaste for their corporate tag lines. Millions of marketing research dollars spent....then millions of advertising dollars spent, to get...our money. Your money. My money. They need to have their "brand" positioned correctly in the marketplace in order to get our money. They attempt to "disarm" us with positive affirmations, empowering lifestyle messages and clever plays-on-words. But still, we know they don't really care about our lives being "better". We know they just want "it", our money.
*sigh*
And they know that times have changed from the commonplace, everyday mindless, controllable-consumer to the savvy, internet-researching, powerful and resourceful consumer. They know we are armed with information and therefore will be difficult to control. So they needed to make their tag lines "stroke" us a little bit more while still conveying the message of: "Buy shit from our store". They needed to appeal to our intelligence with "lifestyle" messages in order to reinvent their brand and image, to get us to buy shit at their store. New tag lines have emerged that are assertive, confident, reassuring, simple, elementary, clever and, most importantly: THE MESSAGE HAD BETTER NOT TELL ME WHAT TO DO. For example, Lowes used to be:
"Let's Build Something Together".
No, let's not. I don't want to build something with you. I want to build something my fucking self thank you, because I can. I don't need your shitty help, Lowe's. I want to build it with the incredible information that I recently acquired. I have the power...So Lowe's changed it to:
"never stop improving".
Which sounds like a chorus to an 80's Arena-Rock hit single! THAT'S what I want right there. A tag line that makes me feel more uplifted and empowered while I "Never stop improving" my home... with the materials I just bought at your store...fuck you Lowe's.
Or Wal-Mart with:
"Save Money. Live Better"
Simple. Nasty. Appeals to my "just-keep-it-simple-for-me-and-don't-insult-my-intelligence-because-I-have-so-much-power-through-information-that-I-won't-fall-for-any-fucking-sales-pitches" sense of mind. Their old tag line was:
"Always Low Prices"
You think I don't fucking know that Wal-Mart????? You think I didn't just look up on the internet that your store boasts lower prices than other stores, all the time??? I can't tell that's your "niche" huh??? You think I'm stupid??? Fuck off, I'm not going to your store.
Or perhaps, JCPenny's new tag line (Yes, they are still in business...surprised me too reader!):
"We Make It Affordable. You Make It Yours."
"Cool". Now that they matter-of-factly told me that things are affordable there, if I decide, through my extensive research process of "where things are affordable", that's the place to go, I might just go "make it mine". Confidently mine because I researched it.
But JCPenny can't be happy with just one tag line from what I hear. They also have an ongoing tag line to force on us from time to time. That's right reader, they have two corporate tag lines going simultaneously!! This borders on insulting my intelligence. Here's that tag line:
“New look. New day. Who knew!"
That's it! My intelligence is insulted now. That sounds like a stupid line from "Sex In The City" or some fucking Rachel Ray cooking show! It sucks and you know what? Just writing it has officially made me angry enough to never go to JCPenny's. Get with it you assholes!!!
Anyway, for kicks over the weekend, my genius-level administrative team and myself decided that things need to change in the constant barrage of corporate tag lines and Metal band album names. We feel that it would be refreshing to live in a world where Metal Band album names and corporate tag lines traded places. Like, I'd be listening to Cradle Of Filth's new album "America Runs on Dunkin" while driving to: Lowe's ("Asylum Of The Human Predator") to get some plumbing fixtures.
Maybe while shopping in Wal-Mart, (tag line "We Are The Nightmare"), I decide to purchase the new Baptized In Blood album entitled, "Never Stop Improving"???
Or, I'd be watching American Football or something and a commercial airs for McDonalds, "Death Cult Armageddon". I like cults. I don't currently like McDonalds. But with a tag line containing the word "cult"?? ....I'll have a Big Mac please. Actually, make it two.
You get it?
Anyway, this would serve to not only "lighten up" some of the Metal bands of the world but also to carve out the edgy tag lines that all of us super-informed/empowered consumers will eventually need to be stimulated. AND, since we're "always playin' games" here at ZFJ Blog (thinking of this for the ZFJ Blog tag line), we encourage you to have good times of your own this holiday season with friends and family by switching Metal band album names and corporate tag lines!!!
Ok, I'm outta here...going to listen to the new With Blood Comes Cleansing album, "We Make Smiles", while doin' some cardio at the gym.
Bye!
~ZFJ
And happy holiday season...which, if you have turned on the television, entered a retail store, listened to the radio or have generally been not-sleeping to any extent, you have already been innundated with holiday messages, huge sales alerts and various other messages. All serving to drive home the point of how we "need" to get out and buy shit.
But first, I'd like to mention that I had a great weekend full of recording music, attending "Friendsgiving" and watching the Dolphins win their third straight game. I don't know what the future of "The Bastion of Despair" will be now that the Fins just can't stop winning... I'll just have to cross that bridge when it is time. On Saturday evening, right after the studio session, we drove to Cambridge for "Friendsgiving", and despite our fatigue, it was a fun holiday time as per usual. Friendsgiving really kicks off the holiday season, in my opinion. Prior to the evenings festivities in Cambridge, our Saturday recording session was rewarding and liberating, as recording sessions usually are for us. Not many things can replace the feeling of "making it official", with regards to the music we've been working on for the last year or so. Here's a shout out to Zeuss, Metal music Producer/engineer extraordinaire --and also our drum track engineer for this album. We don't play Metal music but we sure do like the raw drum tones he can get!! The guy is meticulous. The guy is awesome.
While at the studio with drum tracking in-progress, we engaged in our tradition of perusing the selection of Metal magazines in order to find Metal band names and album titles that are funny to us. We not only found a few gems, but also realized how dead fucking serious these bands are about striking fear into the hearts of the listener. And how serious they are about tapping into the "black" parts of the soul and the mind in their album titles. It occured to us that Metal bands, especially "Death" Metal, "Black" Metal, "Viking" Metal and the like, will forever be locked in an everlasting quest to create super-fast, highly agressive and very evil music. Equally important to the quest of fast, evil music is the quest to name their albums in the most fear-inspiring, "dark", occult-like and sickening-thought-conjuring nature. Which is funny. Here's a few samples:
Baptized in Blood, "Baptized in Blood"
Carnifex, "The Diseased and the Poisoned"
Hell Within, "Asylum of the Human Predator"
With Blood Comes Cleansing, "Horror"
Arsis, "We Are the Nightmare"
Dimmu Borgir, "Death Cult Armageddon"
Cradle Of Filth, "Damnation And A Day"
Wow. Take it easy? Life isn't that bad? Try to tell that to these bands though and they will gladly kill you with their evil bare hands or, and surely most preferably to them, with a human sacrifice --of YOU-- to Satan, or whatever other dark entity they're singing about. Watch it?
*sigh*
Well reader, Happy Holidays, again. Now is the time of year that hopefully we can unwind and spend quality time with loved ones, family and friends. It's the time of year for giving. And it's the time of year that retail operations in this country energetically and methodically drill this message into our brains and souls. We know, we know...we "have" to give presents. We have to spend money and they, the various retail operations, love receiving our money. This is not a secret, we all know that they're in business to make money. We just endure the blitzkrieg that begins around Halloween....Every season.......Every channel....Every commercial... Every radio.....Every website.....Every possible form of pressure to buy, both subtle and overt.
But that's not even my point. What I'm getting at is how all this effort only enhances my personal distaste for their corporate tag lines. Millions of marketing research dollars spent....then millions of advertising dollars spent, to get...our money. Your money. My money. They need to have their "brand" positioned correctly in the marketplace in order to get our money. They attempt to "disarm" us with positive affirmations, empowering lifestyle messages and clever plays-on-words. But still, we know they don't really care about our lives being "better". We know they just want "it", our money.
*sigh*
And they know that times have changed from the commonplace, everyday mindless, controllable-consumer to the savvy, internet-researching, powerful and resourceful consumer. They know we are armed with information and therefore will be difficult to control. So they needed to make their tag lines "stroke" us a little bit more while still conveying the message of: "Buy shit from our store". They needed to appeal to our intelligence with "lifestyle" messages in order to reinvent their brand and image, to get us to buy shit at their store. New tag lines have emerged that are assertive, confident, reassuring, simple, elementary, clever and, most importantly: THE MESSAGE HAD BETTER NOT TELL ME WHAT TO DO. For example, Lowes used to be:
"Let's Build Something Together".
No, let's not. I don't want to build something with you. I want to build something my fucking self thank you, because I can. I don't need your shitty help, Lowe's. I want to build it with the incredible information that I recently acquired. I have the power...So Lowe's changed it to:
"never stop improving".
Which sounds like a chorus to an 80's Arena-Rock hit single! THAT'S what I want right there. A tag line that makes me feel more uplifted and empowered while I "Never stop improving" my home... with the materials I just bought at your store...fuck you Lowe's.
Or Wal-Mart with:
"Save Money. Live Better"
Simple. Nasty. Appeals to my "just-keep-it-simple-for-me-and-don't-insult-my-intelligence-because-I-have-so-much-power-through-information-that-I-won't-fall-for-any-fucking-sales-pitches" sense of mind. Their old tag line was:
"Always Low Prices"
You think I don't fucking know that Wal-Mart????? You think I didn't just look up on the internet that your store boasts lower prices than other stores, all the time??? I can't tell that's your "niche" huh??? You think I'm stupid??? Fuck off, I'm not going to your store.
Or perhaps, JCPenny's new tag line (Yes, they are still in business...surprised me too reader!):
"We Make It Affordable. You Make It Yours."
"Cool". Now that they matter-of-factly told me that things are affordable there, if I decide, through my extensive research process of "where things are affordable", that's the place to go, I might just go "make it mine". Confidently mine because I researched it.
But JCPenny can't be happy with just one tag line from what I hear. They also have an ongoing tag line to force on us from time to time. That's right reader, they have two corporate tag lines going simultaneously!! This borders on insulting my intelligence. Here's that tag line:
“New look. New day. Who knew!"
That's it! My intelligence is insulted now. That sounds like a stupid line from "Sex In The City" or some fucking Rachel Ray cooking show! It sucks and you know what? Just writing it has officially made me angry enough to never go to JCPenny's. Get with it you assholes!!!
Anyway, for kicks over the weekend, my genius-level administrative team and myself decided that things need to change in the constant barrage of corporate tag lines and Metal band album names. We feel that it would be refreshing to live in a world where Metal Band album names and corporate tag lines traded places. Like, I'd be listening to Cradle Of Filth's new album "America Runs on Dunkin" while driving to: Lowe's ("Asylum Of The Human Predator") to get some plumbing fixtures.
Maybe while shopping in Wal-Mart, (tag line "We Are The Nightmare"), I decide to purchase the new Baptized In Blood album entitled, "Never Stop Improving"???
Or, I'd be watching American Football or something and a commercial airs for McDonalds, "Death Cult Armageddon". I like cults. I don't currently like McDonalds. But with a tag line containing the word "cult"?? ....I'll have a Big Mac please. Actually, make it two.
You get it?
Anyway, this would serve to not only "lighten up" some of the Metal bands of the world but also to carve out the edgy tag lines that all of us super-informed/empowered consumers will eventually need to be stimulated. AND, since we're "always playin' games" here at ZFJ Blog (thinking of this for the ZFJ Blog tag line), we encourage you to have good times of your own this holiday season with friends and family by switching Metal band album names and corporate tag lines!!!
Ok, I'm outta here...going to listen to the new With Blood Comes Cleansing album, "We Make Smiles", while doin' some cardio at the gym.
Bye!
~ZFJ
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